Eventually, he stopped coming to class and I heard he had quit. It was great for me at the time and I moved up the belt ranks without fear. At least I could build up confidence somewhere! After the encounter with Shay, I was upset and nervous. What would Jake do? What would he say to me? Would he even say anything? I knew I wouldn’t hear the end of it if all his friends found out. I would be teased and humiliated for the rest of my middle and high school days. But I couldn’t help it. I was so mesmerized by him, by his dangerousness. He never said anything to me that day or for the whole week following that dreadful phone call. I was sad and angry that he never gave me a response or even acknowledged me. But I was still curious. Could I give it one more try? I don’t know why kids that age can never give up on a crush, but I fell prey like so many before me. I wrote him a note in math class, folded it into one of those secret-note-folding-techniques that kids invent during their. God visited the woman a week later to see how she was getting on. “Not bad” said the woman, “I’ve given up smoking and drinking but then I bent over to get some stuff out of the freezer and my boyfriend caught sight of my long slender legs, he pulled up my skirt, pulled my panties to one side and made love to me right then and there.” “They don’t like that in heaven,” God said. The woman replied, “They’re not too happy about it in Costco either!”1. My wife and I divorced over religious differences. She thought she was God and I didn’t!2. I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.3. Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.5. Don’t take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.6. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.9. I’m not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.10. Out of my mind ....
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